Stephen Wraysford, the protagonist of Birdsong, and his different relationships with women prove to be a plentiful source of meaning throughout the novel. When he begins his love affair with Isabelle, he frees her from the strict oppression imposed by marriage and society. He gives new significance to her life, as Jeanne does for him after the war effectively makes his life void of meaning. However, some may argue that the relationships between men are also significant. His relationship Jack gives them both something to live for as they face death in the tunnels, and his relationship with Levi could symbolise the end of the war itself. It appears that Birdsong’s most significant relationships are those between men because they develop the central theme of war in the novel. 
It could be argued that the relationship between Isabelle and Stephen is just as meaningful as those between men in the novel. Before her love affair with Stephen begins, Faulks portrays Isabelle as imprisoned and oppressed by her marriage with Azaire. She is forced to behave in a “strong and formal” way in a house with “iron railings”, which connotes the image of bars on a prison window. The violence and passionless sex that Azaire forces Isabelle to endure incarcerate her in a life she does not want, a life “made intense by desperation” to escape. Her life is defined by “submissive indifference”, until she begins her love affair with Stephen. Before meeting him, Faulks refers to Isabelle as the “wife” of Azaire or “Madame Azaire”. After the love affair, new meaning is given to her life, and she is free to become “Isabelle” again. However, a much greater reading suggests that this relationship lacks meaning altogether. Faulk presents the passionate love affair between the two characters as sensual, and as only appealing to sexual impulses. It is described as a “simple frisson”, with no more meaning than that. It is founded by “charged senses” and impulse: they performed sexual acts “without thinking”, and merely to provide each other with “excitement”. The relationship between Stephen and Isabelle lacks any deeper meanings because it is all about appealing to the senses. Once the passion of the love affair dies (becoming an “icy stillness”) they have no reason to continue the relationship. Isabelle runs away without telling Stephen about their unborn child, connoting that their relationship lacks the meaning and depth needed to raise a child.
Nevertheless, Faulks presents the relationship between Stephen and Jeanne as just as meaningful as those between men. During the First World War, Stephen “lost…reality itself”. His life appears absent of meaning as he is left “drifting” from battle to battle. Even his humanity is missing as he experiences this “test on how far man can be degraded”. This presentation of the protagonist changes once he meets Jeanne. She acts as a “soft” support for the traumatised character, filling in the “void” created by the war. When Jeanne reveals her love for Stephen, and they start to raise Isabelle’s child as their own, a new meaningful life is created to follow the war- he becomes “much happier in his heart” as a result. Thus, it appears that the relationship between Jeanne and Stephen is one of meaning and significance. Without it, Stephen would be “empty” and have nothing. However, a much more meaningful relationship in the novel is the one between Jack and Stephen. They are trapped in the tunnels for many days, and Stephen develops a much more meaningful bond with Jack as they genuinely believe they are going to die together- “they were facing death”. The use of the pronoun “they” unites these two characters together, thus emphasising the strength of their relationship. Faulks presents these two characters as intimately connected through their understanding of the other’s horrifying experiences in the war. Both know what it is like to lose someone they love, and they are both searching for “whatever miracle” they can find as they try to survive in the tunnels. Their relationship is so meaningful because they share a fundamental intimacy of understanding. This is best exemplified when the two characters lose a sense of the outside world- “there was no time”. Both characters have lost the worldly concept of time; their relationship and understanding of each other is all they have. This is what makes the relationship between these two men more meaningful than the one he shares with his wife. 
The most meaningful relationship in the novel is the one connecting Levi and Stephen. Structurally, Faulks oscillates the narrative point of view of the ending between Levi and Stephen as they tunnel towards each other. This constant switching of point of view appears to symbolise the gradual peace being brokered between Britain and Germany. They are both climbing through the metaphorical “darkness” of the war to find peace and each other. Together, these characters are presented as sorrowful and traumatised by the war they were forced to endure: “weeping at the bitter strangeness of their human lives”. Despite their different nationalities, Faulks highlights the enduring bond between these characters as they have both seen atrocities “that should never be spoken”. Their relationship appears to symbolise peace between two fighting countries as they escape the “inhumanity” of World War One and return to the world they once knew. Whilst some may argue that the shared burial of Jack and Joseph actually symbolises the healing of two countries, it is clear that the relationship between Levi and Stephen represents this newfound peace to a greater extent. This friendship between a British and a German character is most significant to the novel because it evokes hope after the horrors of war. Despite feeling immense “hate” for each other earlier, Faulks uses this relationship between men to show us that reconciliation and peace are possible.
Whilst it could be argued that the love affair between Stephen and Isabelle brings emancipation and meaning to the latter, it is clear that their love affair is one of sensuality and appealing to sexual impulse. Nothing more. This does not mean Stephen cannot have a meaningful relationship with women though. In fact, Jeanne’s love for Stephen brings a lot of purpose to his life as she fills the void left by the First World War. Nevertheless, the most significant relationships Stephen experiences are those with other men. Stephen’s relationship with Jack is all he has within the tunnels as they both believe they are on the verge of death. The relationship between Levi and Stephen, which closes the war sections of the novel, is most meaningful for symbolising the healing of wounds and the peace between two warring countries. Faulks appears to be suggesting that the relationships between men during wartime are more intimate and meaningful than any marriage or love affair can possibly be. The relationships between soldiers are so meaningful because they give each other reason to survive in near-death situations, while also giving hope to the reader that the two warring countries can finally find peace.
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